Ready to dive into the reality of leadership and making decisions? Let’s get into it.
Hello, beautiful human. It is me, Rebecca Wiener McGregor, the Anxiety Eraser, and welcome to another episode of Effective Immediately the show where we talk about leadership, healthy emotions, abundance, and a whole bunch of other good stuff. And I give you a mindset shift that you can take and make effective immediately.
Today we are talking about making decisions as a leader. Let’s talk about the reality of making imperfect decisions, why we want to make decisions as leaders, and how we won’t be everybody’s favorite. But we need to do it for our own reality, for our own desires, and for our own forward movement. Okay, let’s talk about the heart of decisions. I don’t know if this gets talked about enough, but sometimes, as spiritual beings, we will want to rely on signs and signals and intuitions and for the conditions to be just right. I’ve done this myself, waiting for all of the conditions to be just right to make a decision. And what happens during that time is that we delay a decision. And we end up using and spending time, spending mental energy thinking about it. We are spending money, usually by not making decisions as quickly and swiftly as we could because we are trying to rely on something outside of ourselves. Now this can happen, and I want you to be very gentle with yourself, very loving with yourself if you’ve ever done this, because we want to rely on certain conditions to be right for us to make a decision. But we’re the creator of the conditions. We’re the ones who get to make the conditions right for ourselves. Sometimes we will avoid listening to our intuition. We will avoid listening to our own inner knowings, our own messages from our higher self, from the Divine, from the Universe, because we are waiting for some condition to be right. Where we keep pushing it away, we keep pushing the decision away, waiting for something to tell us that it’s okay to make the decision. And what we’re doing is actually avoiding listening to our own knowing, avoiding listening to our own understanding, avoiding making the decision because the truth of the matter is we’re avoiding the consequence or the outcome of making the decision. Okay, let that settle in.
For many of you, there’s a part of you that knows this already, right? There’s a part of you that knows when you make a decision that there will be an outcome, there will be an action, there will be a consequence. There’s a consequence for every decision that we make. Sometimes those decisions create difficult consequences. Sometimes, we will be unpopular. Sometimes people will disagree. Sometimes we will have to take a hard action once we’ve made the decision. You can see how simple it is for our subconscious mind to push back those decisions to avoid making those decisions. Because remember, our subconscious mind doesn’t give a flying fig about our happiness. It doesn’t give a flying fig about our fulfillment. It cares about keeping us safe and in the familiar. So if we are in the familiar, and we are moving day by day, we’re going through life. We are having desires, we are having big visions, we are wanting forward movement. But making a decision and taking the action after the decision will cause a change. Our subconscious mind can sometimes block that. So being very loving with yourself. Remember, this is not a place for judgment. We’re just collecting data.
Think about a time when you knew the action. You knew the decision all the time. You knew exactly what you needed to do when you needed to do it. But the things that were going to fall into place, or move out of place, or shift after you made the decision, were going to be difficult. So you didn’t make the decision. Now, let me give you a clue. There’s a very, very powerful clue when you or someone that you love is in this place. And it’s the repetition of the word “I don’t know.” And it’ll sound like this: “I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do.” When you hear it like that, when you think back to a time when you have said that yourself, you can recognize that there was a decision to be made. The decision was already made probably in your head and in your heart but the action was not taken because of the consequences. These kinds of blocks can be very difficult to overcome. These moments when we avoid making decisions in our leadership or in our lives, or in our self-leadership, because of the potential outcomes, so we can stay stalled for years. We can be at the same income for years. We can be in the same job that is not serving us for years. We can be in the same position in a role that we created in our own business for years because of the fear of making the decision, the fear of the outcome, the fear of the success, the fear of the failure, the fear that someone will be hurt, someone will be irritated that you will lose popularity, any of that can play into this. Now, I specialize in helping transformational leaders create new realities for themselves, new financial realities, new leadership realities for themselves. And that means shifting the beliefs, creating new space for new beliefs, and creating the capacity for receiving and allowing great things into your life. You can find out more about that by going to rebeccawiener.com or connecting with me for a call at callwithrebecca.com. And here, right now, I want you to know that so many pieces of your business, so many pieces of your life, are just a single decision away. It doesn’t have to be complicated to make the decision. It doesn’t have to be difficult to make the decision. What has to be in place is a deep level of self-trust, that whatever happens afterward, you know that you can manage it.
Making Imperfect Decisions
Let’s look at what it looks like to make decisions from a place of leadership and to do it imperfectly. What if you allowed yourself to make a decision and trusted that it didn’t matter if it was perfect? That it didn’t matter if the decision caused some other kind of thing to come out as some imperfection to come out in your life because you learn from your imperfections. You learn from making decisions. You learn from operating through the consequences. You learn from a state of being a beginner. You learn from being messy. Now this can actually bring up lots of feelings, right? You can have lots of feelings in your body right now, as I’m talking in this kind of messy way about being imperfect. Now, does this mean that we make decisions willy-nilly, that we don’t care about the outcomes? Of course not. But when faced with a situation where you know you have to make a decision, but you’re not entirely sure what the outcome is going to be, and you are stalling because you’re worried about being imperfect, you’re costing yourself time, money, mental capacity, and so much more. So when faced with the option of making a decision that might be imperfect, what if you just cared a little bit less about being perfect? And you cared a little bit more about momentum? You cared a little bit more about growing and shifting and allowing yourself to be imperfect. If you’re in the perfectionism state, this might be bringing up some stuff for you. So I want you to be really gentle, really loving with yourself. And I want you to allow yourself just to think about that imperfection is not a sign of weakness. Being messy with your outcomes, being messy in your life, making a little bit of a mess, not doing the right thing all the time can actually lead to some very beautiful outcomes and is a testament to you being a human. So if you are thinking about all the times that you made the imperfect decision right now, I want you to give yourself a lot of love. Maybe a little hand on your heart, to just be with yourself and recognize that it is okay to be imperfect. It is okay to be imperfect and still take steps forward. Powerful leaders, leaders who create change, who move the masses, whether it is in their homes, in their businesses, or in the Universe, they make massive change. They are imperfect. And they do take steps. And they allow themselves to be imperfect. They allow themselves to be imperfect in pursuit of the goal, in pursuit of their mission and vision. If you never put yourself out there, if you never fully allow yourself to get messy, what are you actually holding back? You’re holding back your spirit, you’re holding back your fulfillment, you’re holding back your potential.
We all know that we learn from our mistakes, right? Like, ideally, we learn from our mistakes. So in those moments when we make imperfect decisions, and we even recognize that there is potential to make a mistake, to make a decision, and that it may not turn out the way that you hope it turns out that there is a lesson in that. Once again, we’re not making decisions just from willy-nilly, you know, throwing a dart at something and trying to create an outcome from that. We’re making a decision based on our best-educated guess, our best option of all the options that we have. So if we make “the wrong” and I’m using air quotes, if you’re listening to this if we make the wrong decision, and it feels like it turns into a mistake. We have made that mistake, not by chance. There is a purpose here, there is an opportunity here to learn something about that mistake. I don’t even really believe in mistakes anymore. I actually believe in being messy and taking imperfect action, trying things, and seeing if it’s going to work. Allowing it to not work because of what I will learn and what I will gain from the experience. All that data that I will collect, about how I respond to the mistake, where my mind goes, how I treat myself, how we treat others, these are all places just a few right off the top that I can think of where when I make a mistake, I can have an opportunity to learn and grow. And that’s the name of the game, right? That’s what we’re here for. We’re here to transform ourselves and the world. And this will be an imperfect path. And I keep using the word messy because it will get messy. It will be imperfect. And you could still make it through it.
What else do we learn from making imperfect decisions? We learn resilience and adaptability. We allow ourselves to come back from these mistakes. We allow ourselves to see a feeling of a misstep or mistake to happen and to see okay, I can right this ship. I can turn things around, I can get back on track by doing this. And we learn to trust ourselves after making difficult moves. We learn to trust ourselves that it’s safe for us to make decisions because we know that we can handle the outcomes. This is the biggest thing that is behind making powerful decisions is the self-trust. Self-trust; trust that we can handle the situation. That we can handle coming back from it, that we are resilient, and that we can see a path even when it gets messy. Yeah, let’s love some messy, shall we? It is okay to make an imperfect decision and to bounce back from it. This is the hallmark of resilience. Resilience and adapting strategies, shifting on the fly, and approaching things from a new direction and a new perspective that is how we grow. That is how we challenge ourselves. That is how we stretch ourselves. And that is how we move into new stages of leadership with ourselves and with others. Being vulnerable enough to make a mistake, to make a decision, and to not exactly know how it’s going to turn out but to stand in the truth of what that decision means moving things forward is a very vulnerable place to be, right? And that is a very strong pillar of strength. To be willing to not exactly know the outcome, to be willing to move forward anyway, to be scared, even as the decision is made, and to still move forward. Lots of people are making decisions from a place of knowing and understanding, and there can still be a little bit of fear there. That puts us in a vulnerable state. And it also allows us to grow. Anytime we put ourselves under pressure, or we manage the pressure by making the decision, even though there’s a little bit of fear there. Or maybe there’s a lot of fear there because we don’t know how it’s going to look, we don’t know how other people are going to respond. We don’t know what the ripple effect will be exactly. But we know that we must make this decision to further the mission, to further the vision, to further our growth. This is a very powerful place to be. Okay, so you might be having lots of stuff come up, right? Just remembering that stuff’s gonna come up during these conversations and letting it all be data. Letting it point out where there may be a place for you to grow, there may be a place for you to pay attention to, there may be a place for you to allow yourself to get a little messy. This is a place where you’ve brought yourself to a limit, right?
Some of you know that I like to say that fear is a mother effer, but it is not the enemy. Fear is not the enemy here. Fear is your subconscious mind reacting to the potential for change. When you’re not in an actual dangerous situation, it is simply your brain reacting to change. The potential for change, not even the actual change yet, but the potential for change. Sometimes in the face of potential change, one of those is criticism and not being liked. It is very possible that people will criticize your decisions. And you may hear about it. You may have been judged many, many times in your life for the way that you are, the gifts that you have, the ways that you’ve done things. Many transformational leaders that I know are kind of the black sheep of the family, we’ll say, the one who is unique, the one who is creative, the one who is willing to do the things to move the mission forward, right? To help the world, to help themselves and they see things in a different way. And that can feel a little scary, and when the people around you are used to doing things the conventional way, they begin to criticize you. You may hear so and so said this about you. They may say it directly to your face. And this can cause us to shrink and avoid making decisions altogether. Big decisions, right? Then we get to remember that we’re making many hundreds of decisions every single day that turned out just fine. And when there’s a big decision to be made, or it appears big, because the outcome, the potential of the outcome is big, we can shy away from that. So, as you think about these decisions to make, these shifts to make, I want you to consider that it’s okay not to be liked. It’s okay to be criticized. It’s okay to have people have a different opinion than you. It’s okay for people to be irritated with your decision. When your decision is aligned in alignment with your values, and your standards, and the things that you are trying to create for yourself, and the belief that you have in the power of your work, your mission, your vision, there will be people who do not agree. And that’s okay. You are allowed to move forward anyway. Notice what that’s bringing up for you. Notice the physical responses in your body, paying attention to this because this is the kind of thing that we can shift. We can shift and calm those responses in your body so that it is easier for you to make decisions. The first step is becoming aware of them. So good job noticing, noticing what’s happening, collecting that data, and allowing yourself to move forward anyway.
This really falls on the heels of what I just talked about, about not always being liked and facing criticism. There is a part of you, a part of your leadership, that is so important that you have to balance popularity with integrity. Making decisions in your leadership, making decisions as a leader of your family, your business, your community, your movement, you will make decisions that may not be the popular decision. But they will be in alignment with your integrity. For example, I’ll just use something very, very simple. You may have a program that you have been offering in your business for years. And it has brought you a lot of popularity, it has brought you a lot of money, it has brought lots of people into your audience. And there comes a point where you decide that there’s something about that program that is no longer aligned with you. Something that you were teaching, something that you were sharing, that actually has a limitation in it. And because you have furthered yourself, you have moved forward in your life, you have uncovered a limitation that you have, and that program is no longer in alignment with your integrity because it is furthering a limitation that you have moved past. You have to close down the program. You have to shift the program. There has to be some change made to the program. But it’s scary because the program has been so popular, has been so great, and has helped so many people. But there’s a part of you that knows that you are furthering this limitation. You are sending out a ripple of this limitation by offering this program. You can see as a transformational leader, that there will be a moment where something has to change within that program, right? Some decision has to be made to shift the program, to shift the way it’s taught, to remove that limitation from that program in some way. And that may mean shutting down the program, reinventing the program. And that will cause a ripple to the people who’ve been in the program, right? But you can recognize how valuable and important it is to still make the decision and make the change to operate from your integrity. And this will come up in many different ways in your life that you grow as a person, you will notice okay, this kind of decision is a decision that is made for my integrity. This is a decision if I make this choice, this will be operating out of my integrity. And there you choose your integrity, your self-leadership over popularity. Notice what’s coming up in your body. Pay attention to that it’s all data. Nothing to be judging yourself about. I’m not judging you. Try not to judge yourself. Just look at what comes up so that you can work through these limitations and expand your leadership. The more you expand your leadership, the easier everything gets. Okay?
Now, making imperfect decisions does not define your leadership. I’ll say it again. Making imperfect decisions does not define your leadership. You making decisions moving forward, operating from your integrity, operating from your standards, operating from your values, operating from your vision, and operating from the commitment you have to your mission is what influences your leadership. And let’s not forget that making a decision is simply clearing away over and over all the things that you don’t want in pursuit of what you do want.
Your Effective Immediately Moment
Are you ready for your effective immediately moment of the week? As you are faced with a decision, as you are faced with something that needs to happen, some choice that you have to make, and you notice that you are stalling, you are avoiding, you have pushed it off, you have moved the decision down the calendar because it is just impossible for you to make, I want you to put your hand on your heart and I want you to ask yourself, Am I avoiding taking action? Why am I avoiding taking the action? Why am I avoiding making the decision that will cause me to take the action? And what outcome or circumstances am I hoping to avoid by stalling? Gather your intel, gather the data, and then allow yourself to take a step forward. You can make a decision without taking the action right away. Or you can look at the data and see if it is costing you mental space, if it is costing you money, if it is costing you time, if it is pulling from your energy in any way. Gather up all that data and use that to look logically and peel back the emotion if you have to. Allow yourself to take the step forward, to make the decision to take the action, letting it be perfectly imperfect so that you can move forward. Be so loving with yourself. take such good care of this decision by actually making it, and take good care of your leadership by using your decision-making to build your character, your resilience, your integrity and your values.
All right, if you are ready for your new financial reality, your new reality of what’s possible for you in your life and in your business, please reach out, and I can help you create that. rebeccawiener.com is where you can find me, or if you want to schedule a call directly, you can go to callwithrebecca.com. I will see you in two weeks. We’ll be taking next week off. Have a beautiful holiday season, and I will see you in the New Year. Bye for now.
About the Author:
Rebecca Wiener McGregor, also known as The Anxiety Eraser, is a seasoned transformational hypnotist, trauma healer, and abundance coach. Since 2004, she guides visionary women to break free from anxiety, blocks, traumas, and fears, leading them to a life filled with abundance and purpose. Through her book “Loving Her” and work with conscious women executives, leaders, coaches, and healers worldwide, Rebecca sparks profound transformations, helping her clients embrace their true selves and create impactful, joyful, fulfilling lives.
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